Rap artists are usually known for their lyrical prowess and their ability to spin a rhyme on command. Unfortunately, not all famous rap artists have quite mastered the ability to write the most genius lyrics, leaving us with these strange quips.
Young Jeezy – “Black Dreams”
This song starts out quite promising. Young Jeezy is showing us how hardcore he really is. “Mafia Mafia, b****, I’m in the Mafia”. But some of his street cred flounders (pardon the pun) when he breaks out his knowledge of gourmet fish. “Speakin my language if you talkin bout tilapia”. Granted, the Mafia is a criminal organization with loads of money, but I’m not entirely certain they spend their time discussing fish.
Oj the Juiceman – Basically anything he’s ever written
I had only ever heard one song by the Juiceman and decided to investigate some more before I put him on this list. I couldn’t choose which song had the strangest lyrics. They were all pretty unique. My personal favorite, though, is from his song “Homer”. “Krispy green charm, b**** look at my arm, I’m Texaco”. I’m not sure what “krispy green charm” is or if it is actually charming, or what his arm has to do with signifying that he is Texaco, but I am impressed with his ability to keep me listening despite the strange things spewing from his mouth.
Chingy – “Balla Baby”
Chingy is non-discriminatory in choosing his lovers. Like he says, “I like them black, white, Puerto Rican or Haitian. Like Japanese, Chinese, or even Asian”. Actually, hold that thought. Maybe Chingy doesn’t understand geography or ethnicities, but at least we can say he tried. Right?
Ghostface Killah – “Nutmeg”
This entire song is a mess. I’m fairly certain he’s just combining series of phrases he’s heard in his life that rhyme. The shining moment of this song? “Scooby snack, Jurassic plastic gas, booby trap”. Maybe Ghostface Killah ran out of creativity after he created his name. Or maybe he was just listening to the Fairly Oddparents theme song when writing this masterpiece.
Living Legends – “Brand New”
“I keep it O.G. watching episodes of O.C.” Maybe I missed the Original Gangster episodes of the O.C., but I’m not entirely sure this is what you want to confess if you’re living an O.G. life. But I’m not one to judge.
Dr. Dre – “Nuthin’ But A G Thang”
“Never let me slip, cause if I slip, then I’m slippin.” As much as I want to criticize this, it’s fairly accurate. If he slips, he will indeed be slipping. Maybe Dr. Dre should just let other people write his lyrics.
Silkk the Shocker – “My Car”
“I got more hoes than the O-zone” I’m not entirely sure how many hoes the O-zone has, but at least I know that Silkk has more. Maybe this means he has at least one.
Prodigy – “Click Clack”
I won’t lie. I’m a sucker for incorporating literature into songs. Unfortunately, Prodigy’s incorporation of Jack and the Beanstalk leaves me more disturbed than happy. “It’s like fee, fie, foe, fum, I smell the blood of a jealous a** punk.” I feel like my childhood is being corrupted.
LFO – “Summer Girls”
I will give LFO this: they are educational in their attempt at rhyming. “When you take a sip you buzz like a hornet/Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets.” Hornet and sonnets are close enough in the rhyming section and at least I now know that it was Shakespeare who wrote all of those sonnets I had been hearing about.
Mase- “Can’t Hold Me Down”
This is my personal favorite. “Young, black, and famous, with money hanging out the anus.” Kids, this is why money is gross. On second thought, Mase might want to get that looked at.